Want to share my thoughts on disappointment, because there’s no one on earth that can escape it, even the people that seem to have it altogether. This got long, but I think it’s very important.
This morning Steve was disappointed in his progress. I was disappointed in myself yesterday, because tuesday I went over in my fat allowance, so yesterday I was supposed to be spot on…. I ate the stinking steak. It was good, but I ended up more than double over my fat allowance from the day before even. I’m not saying my own check-in on Friday still won’t be okay (sometimes the body needs a fat load), but I digress… I still was disappointed in myself.
Disappointment isn’t limited to health and fitness goals, but I know several of you are feeling this in different, very personal ways.
We have one of three responses: let the disappointment turn to persistent negative thoughts, ignore it, or ***be at peace so your mind can be free to find the right solution/path.***
Here are my suggestions on how that 3rd option looks in real life. We need more tools in the field,because sheer will power isn’t enough. (And there is no limit with how often this needs to happen even in a single day.)
>>> Allow yourself to be disappointed, but **only for a little while!** Trying to ignore it only leaves it there to fester.
>>> Remind yourself God did not intend you to live under guilt or self-condemnation! Conviction is very different. Self-condemnation says “I <negative>…” Conviction says “This is the thought/action that needs corrected.” Separate the two in your mind.(Rom 8:1 There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.)
>>> Then think on the possibilities of how you might do things differently. Speak logically to yourself, own up to what you did. Accepting responsibility verbally shifts your mindset from “life is doing this to me” to…
>>> …”I have the power to make diff choices next time. Not perfect choices, but different.” Ask yourself, “What can I do differently next time?” The answer may not come right away, but keep asking. It’s a process of taking steps and learning which ones work and which ones don’t.
I went to bed last night upset, mad because I’d done it and know my Friday may not reflect the progress I’m hoping for. But I’m up today, processing in my mind to accept whatever results, reminding myself in this season of life, slow progress is my reality and I had already chosen to be okay with that. And what I’ll do differently is make sure to incorporate the steak into my day ahead of time, esp since I already knew I was getting it for Steve for dinner last night. Steve reminded himself that all the years he was competing he was in the mortgage industry and he had total power over his own schedule. Now with his new job, it’s out the door before 7am and not home until 6pm and too much going on with our family. Does he want to compete? Yeah. It’s not a never thing, it’s just a not right now thing and he’s good with that.
Hugs and always praying for each of you!